Monday, 18 April 2016


In December 2012 I nervously hit the ‘publish’ button on my latest blog post.  I was about to tell the world (well, anyone who cared to read it!) about something which I had always thought I would never tell anyone, something which I considered to be my shameful childhood secret.  I was about to reveal that I frequently soiled myself as a child, and had carried on doing this until I was 11 years old.

For many years I had believed that people would think the same as me, that frequently pooing my pants when I was well past potty
Back cover blurb for my books
The words are spoken by a fictional character,
but they could have come from my own mouth.
training age was a babyish and disgusting thing to do, and would judge me accordingly.  This was reinforced by the fact that for so many years I had thought that I was the only school aged child in the world that did this.  Although I later became aware that this was not the case, it was still something that I kept quiet about, a part of my past that was best kept secret.

My discovery, via the internet, of just how many children and young people regularly soiled themselves convinced me to open up and tell my story, in the hope that it might help some of them to understand that they were not alone in having this problem, and for the benefit of the many parents who were struggling to cope with their children’s soiling.  In the previous few years I had posted on internet parenting forums about my experiences, but this was the first time I had told my story in a blog post that would include my full name and photographs.

Fortunately the response from parents was positive, many thanking me for sharing my history and, in particular, finding comfort from the fact that I had eventually stopped soiling my pants.  I was not plagued by any internet trolls and no-one was judgemental or disgusted about what I had done as a child.  The post was also consistently the one with the most hits on my blog.

The covers of A Boy Like You and A Girl Like You
The covers of my books
for children who soil.
In 2014 I published a book for older children who soil, called A Child Like You, partly based on my own experiences and have recently republished this in separate editions for boys and girls, called A Boy Like You and A Girl Like You

Now I have decided that the time has come to start a new blog, this time concentrating on the subject of childhood soiling, which is still often considered a taboo subject in ‘the real world’.  I plan to write in greater detail about my experiences through a series of posts, which may be TMI for some people but I have found that being frank and candid about my childhood toilet problems is appreciated by parents of children who soil.  This blog will not continue indefinitely, when I had said everything I have to say I will stop posting, but the blog will remain to hopefully help future sufferers cope with the distressing condition that is encopresis.

Finally, please note that I live in the UK and will be using British terminology in this blog, but I’m sure American readers will be able to translate ‘pants’ into ‘underwear’!  There will be several childhood photographs of myself, but other pictures are posed by models.  These images, which are marked '(c)', are copyright and used under licence.

For more information on childhood soiling and constipation, and other continence issues in children such as bedwetting, daytime wetting and potty training, why not visit the website of the charity ERIC who specialise in helping with these problems.


  1. Thank you so much for writing and publishing your books "A Boy Like You" and "A Girl Like You." The first edition of your book meant so much to our family. The first time I read your book to my son (age 6 at the time) created a memory I will keep for life. It was life-changing. He wouldn't let me stop reading until I reached the end, and we were both in tears at that point. Knowing "we" were not alone was the best medicine we could have ever received. I thank you for mentioning my blog ( at the end of your book. It took our family 2.5 years of the stress of misunderstanding the cause of our son's repeated accidents before the diagnosis of encopresis came, and I never want another family to have to go through what we did. Thanks again for sharing your story. You're affecting more lives than you will ever know.

    1. Thank you, Brianne, I am delighted that my book helped your son, one of my main reasons for writing it was to help children who soil feel less alone.

      I think your own blog, Extended Potty Training, is an excellent resource for parents who are struggling to potty train their child, in particular in helping parents to deal with their emotions when they are faced with frequent wetting and/or soiling accidents.

  2. Oh my goodness I am looking at myself here. I have been reading your posts and can relate to almost everything you wrote. From the photos I would guess I am about the same age as you. I grew up in America so what I went though was a little different but the same. I seen a few of your childhood pictures and gosh you look like I did growing up. I even had many of the facial expressions you did. I had blond hair as a boy as well. I like yourself looked like a normal healthy boy. The only thing was when I needed to poop I held it in and messed my pants. My childhood like yours was a happy time for me despite of my little problem. I was shamed by my parents and relatives that knew what I did. I was given laxatives and Enemas and suppositories( I hated Those with a passion) I had a few good friends growing up and mostly played by myself like you did. Kind of a loaner and still am. The other kids that I was around with in grade school did not know about my problem. They a few times asked what smells. I said I stepped in cat poop. I hid my problem well and it was my secret no one knew about. I had this a little longer than you did from age 6-13. I finally ended this before I entered Jr. High School. I knew of another boy growing up with the same problem I had. I really was not that great of friends with him as he was 5 years younger than I was. His mom and my mom would talk about it. I was very embarrassed about that. Here her son was 6 years old and pooping I'm his pants and there I was 11 years old still pooping in my pants. I thought they were laughing at me. The boys brother who was 4 years old would tease me saying Eric poops his pants in front of other neighborhood boys.

    I like you so wanted to be a normal boy. I wanted to run jump and play like other kids. I never could because I always had a pants full of poop. In PE we had to run and I of course ran funny and kids laughed at me. I remember crying after PE a few times. I so wanted to be normal somehow. I hated myself for pooping in my pants. I was made to feel disordered . I was taken to doctors and psychologists. They made things worse many times.

    Anyway love to chat or blog with someone that went through many of the same things I did growing up. Like you I really thought I was the only kid that had this growing up...

    1. Hi Eric, thank you for posting and telling your story. Your account does sound very similar to mine, although I was never taken to see a doctor or psychologists about my soiling, and only given laxatives occasionally, never enemas or suppositories. But holding in my poop and messing my pants, yes, that was me as well. Did you also stay in messy pants until your accident was discovered, like I did? I was born in 1972, and was generally a healthy and happy boy except for my toilet problems.

      I'm sorry that you went through a hard time and that people made fun of you, but it is always interesting for me to read other's experiences of encopresis. I'm sure many parents will find your story useful too; every enco child is different and the more accounts available from different children's point of view, the better. If you would like to email me you can do so, there is a link on the Contents page of this blog after the list of post titles.